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Happy New Year’s 2012: Drug Free

December 31, 2011 By 2 Comments

Withdrawal SymptomsThe Withdrawal

Tuesday, December 6th marked the last day of taking Effexor ER and the beginning of the withdrawal from H-E-L-L.  What I thought would be a daily bout of wicked nausea, brain zaps, and beyond Linda Blair projectile vomiting coupled with dizziness for at least 6 months turned out to last 17 days.  It was a long 17-days my friend and one I don’t recommend unless you truly want to battle with the deepest of deamons.

My roommate was fairly warned  on the 6th of December knowing full well this was the end of my drug taking days as I said to him, “I’m amazed at how well I’m handling this”, not even realizing what was in store for me for the next two weeks.  He dealt with this withdrawal as best as he knew how.  But the others who are close to me were in store for much more.

My business partner and best friend, Vicki Berry was one of these people who was an integral part of my recovery and as one would deem ‘coming back to normalcy’.  I must give thanks and deserved kudos to those people who were in the mix of my withdrawal and recovery effort.

The Addiction starts 7 years ago….The Withdrawal

I was on Effexor XR for almost 7 years and what I read about this drug was not complementary to my practices, on a daily basis, of health and wellness.  As a USAT Coach and NASM CPT I’m supposed to be the epitome of health and wellness and as I’ve come to realize the Effexor XR  was the antithesis of my daily practices.

I was amazed at my willingness to allow a drug to impact my life with such force that it contributed to my daily depression, loneliness, and mood swings which is counterintuitive of my daily practice with my athletes and personal training clients;  not a very good role-model if I do say so myself.

It’s amazing what you’ll do in your weakest mental moments.  When you don’t believe in yourself, when you doubt everything you stand for, and everything you’ve become.  When you don’t think you can do it, when you embody the fragility and vulnerability our society deems as weakness.

In my weakest of moments which were quite often as I was surrounded by consistent debilitating behavior I decided I needed to lower myself to the level of becoming an addict.  No, I didn’t think of it like that at the time, yet I realize what my decision created for me almost 7 years later.

Withdrawing from a drug that is supposedly non-addictive in composition has been quite a testament to my mental and physical capacity.

Pfizer Effexor XR AddictIs Effexor XR really Non-Addictive?

What I’ve found interesting is the commonality between the pharmacists, the doctors and Pfizer, the drug company responsible for this drug.  Across the board these experts recommend and advise  weaning yourself off this debilitating drug.  So my question is how is a drug classified as non-addictive when you have to wean yourself off the drug?

What classifies non-addiction in this day and age?

Let’s call a Spade a Spade

Here’s my take, and it may sound like I’m being a bit paranoid here, but let’s call a spade a spade:

The drug companies are the biggest lobbyist on Capitol Hill and they have made it impossible for any and all alternative medicine to be introduced to North America because if it weren’t for the drug companies the government wouldn’t be able to brain wash most of those people who can’t handle their lives on a daily basis.

The drugs pushed on the television, the billboards, the magazines, the internet, and a multitude of other means by which they reach all of us at our weakest moments are powerful and because we are a lazy society, we want our fix right now; we want immediate gratification.  The drugs provide this to us within minutes of taking them.

I needed a quick fix, a drug-induced dogma, if you will, and Effexor XR was there to reach out to me to let me know it would be able to alter my mental state of being while at my weakest moments.  It was my savior and as I found out, it was the biggest mistake I ever made with my health.Let's Call A Spade A Spade

When you’re on drugs you see things through a different lens.  The lens of the drug, not your lens.  Take that into consideration when you’re on any drugs.  Pain killers, muscle relaxers, aspirin, anti-inflammatories, and the like.  Your lens is not yours, it’s now the drug’s lens and you have no control over what and how you view the world because it is completely colored by the drug.

I know what this drug does because I know what I felt each and every day of having to withdrawal from not taking it.  I know what I went through on a daily basis, how I was incapacitated and what my body went through for 17 days while I had the brain zaps, the consistent nausea, the dizziness beyond anything I’d ever experienced, the dry mouth, and on goes the list.

What I wondered the entire time as I withdrew was how they could classify this as a non-addictive drug.

Honestly, I’m really fortunate to have the health and wellness I do because quite honestly I couldn’t imagine what I would have gone through if I’d been a heavy drinker, smoker or otherwise really out of shape.  I’m grateful I have the fortitude to know my body and have the common sense to keep my strength and health at the forefront of my every day activities.

Happy New Year's Nicole JolieDecember 31st, New Year’s Eve

Today is December 31st 2011 and I feel awesome. No lie.  I really feel great and I can’t believe how easy it is for me to be transparent with myself and others.   I’ve noticed a complete difference in my mood, my overall well-being and my energy levels.

So much for drugs that are supposed to help me cope; as I have been testimonial to, I believe I’m capable of coping very well on my own without the aid of drugs.

A drug that was supposed to enable me to ‘cope’ with my life debilitated me to the point of having nightmares on a regular basis, being laxidcazical, having extreme loneliness, depression and the like.  An anti-depressant supposed to ‘help’ only hindered and today as I write this, on New Year’s Eve 2011 I am not only proud of my ability to handle the 17 days of complete hell to overcome such an incredible withdrawal for someone who’s never taken or been addicted to drugs in her life.

Happy New Year's Nicole JolieHappy New Year’s Nicole Jolie

I’ve overcome many obstacles and I believe truly I am here on this planet to inspire others to take that step, to let it go, and trust yourself to the best of your capabilities to handle your life without the aid of a mood enhancing drug or a life altering drug or a drug that incapacitates you so that you start doubting everything you do in your life.

With this I say to you and everyone who completely doubts their ability to achieve; you cannot listen to the doubts, the negativity, the less than commentary.

Happy New Year’s Nicole Jolie and the many others who’ve overcome and continue to mark their excellence daily.

 

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Filed Under: Health & Wealth, My Story

Pretty Woman

December 22, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Pretty WomanPretty Woman is my all-time

Favorite Movie

        ….and here’s why

I was walking my dogs tonight while looking at the stars and thinking to myself how much I love the movie Pretty Woman with Richard Gere and Julia Roberts.

Yeah, call it sappy, or maybe I’m living in a fantasy world, but it’s my world and in my world I love the movie Pretty Woman.  Why?  Because  It’s funny, witty, and full of great content that pertains to every day life.

  • Stop and smell the roses, take your shoes off and feel the grass in between your toes, challenge yourself to get out of your comfort zone and live a bit more, laugh a lot more, and know what you’re really capable of creating in the universe.

Pretty WomanThese were some of the things I thought of while looking at the brightly lit sky, seeing Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, and the multitude of stars and planets that make up all of the cool pictures in the astronomy books sitting on a multitude of coffee tables never having been opened.

The best part of that movie was Julia Roberts shopping with Richard Gere’s credit card and his blessings to purchase anything and everything she needs to look the part for being his girlfriend for a week.

You could see she felt so great going to the stores only to purchase the best for herself knowing that someone cared enough of her and about her to give her carte blanche to feel great for that moment in time to purchase everything and anything she wanted to wear.

Maybe you see it differently, but remember, you’re in my world and that’s how I SEE IT.

Granted all the hookers I saw clunking around in Vegas would have taken that card and never come back, but in this particular instance it was great to see Julia Roberts’ character loving the freedom to do what she’d never been able to do for herself and feel good about going back to the hotel without being flagrantly beaten and demoralized by her pimp.

What struck me as I watched this movie ~ over the Thanksgiving holiday with the dogs ~ was she felt she looked beautiful and sexy, like a woman should always look and feel as she walked down the street smiling knowing her poise and delicate stance in high heels caught eyes and glances from afar that were glances of respect and admiration; instead of what she was most commonly used to which were looks of disdain and condemnation because of who she had become in order to keep herself alive.  A person of circumstance, not a victim.

There’s more to this though, because hers is an endearing story.  Why? Because she has nothing (no money, no clothes, no fancy fake boobs or nails) coming into this exchange and expects only to be paid for services rendered.  She has decidedly taken the best possible route she knows to enable herself to live and she’s not waiting for a ‘savior’ she’s just doing her job ~ the oldest profession known to mankind.

I don’t know if you’ve done that; I know I have.  I’ve taken the best route I know of at the time, the desperate route that demeans and demoralizes, but it’s the only route I have at the time based on my current circumstance.  A person of circumstance, not a victim.

A Journey Worthy of a Shopping Spree a Little Love and a Hot Guy!

It was April of 2009 when I started learning about what it takes to become a professional network marketer.  It’s a journey I’ve been on for almost 3 years and it’s definitely worth the suffering for the potential shopping spree, a little love, and a hot guy!  And possibly so much more.

Although, unlike Pretty Woman, I’m not Julia Roberts and unfortunately, I spend too much time behind my computer to ever meet Richard Gere.

I knew there was a better way to make a life for myself and to accomplish my goal of becoming financially independent on my own.  I became very interested in what was going on with marketing, direct sales, mlm, network marketing and the like and found myself captivated by the flashy kids and their flashy stuff.

I was  taken withNicole Jolie what they had accomplished on the web and how they were able to make hundreds of thousands of dollars by really doing nothing.  Or at least that’s what I thought and that’s what they made it look like.

Enter the 17-20 hour days of learning and failing forward flat on my face.

Yeah, it looks easy, but it’s not and baby if you think anyone is going to take their time to teach you for F.R.E.E. you’re absolutely wrong.

 

Celebrities and their Groupies

I can understand why alot of the celebrities of network marketing have the attitude of ‘do it on your own’ because 90%  are groupies who have the attitude that they are owed something by that celebrity network marketer because they are a part of the celebrity’s team.

Mark Hoverson says it best when he tells you to leave your team in the dust and let them figure it out for themselves.  He’s great at this.  He doesn’t hold their hands and never gives more than 3-5 minutes with each person.

Fernando Ceballos said from stage at the No Excuses II Event, [sic] “…if you want to get close to the people you want to emulate, ask them what you can do for them instead of asking them to do for you.”

In the movie, Julia Roberts doesn’t expect the game to go on for longer than the week.  She played the game perfectly and came out with her cash and her awesome clothing and decided to make a change and believe in herself.  She was willing to take a chance to make her dreams come true.

She didn’t expect that Richard Gere was going to save her, but it never fails how many times I hear,

“I joined this MLM and didn’t make any money

because my upline wasn’t willing to take the time with me.”

angry network marketing professional

I wish those types of people never even got involved in this business because they’re the one’s who give network marketing  a really crappy name.

Here’s a good analogy:  When you buy a franchise, as a business owner you are responsible for your business succeeding or failing. You’re responsible for your advertising, you’re responsible for keeping the doors of your business open on your own.

The same applies in your network marketing business.

Just because you have a bright idea, doesn’t make it sale-able.

That’s all it is.  A bright idea.

Until you actually create something with that bright idea or you’re willing to pay someone to do it for you your idea will never come to fruition and you will never make money.

Chicken Soup for the Soul the making of a Celebrity after being rejected over 100 times

Mark Victor Hansen was rejected something like 126 times when he went out to sell his book Chicken Soup for the Soul.  Over 126 publishers told him he had a ‘flop’ of a book that wouldn’t appeal to the mass market.

He didn’t give up.  During this time I don’t think he was receiving a paycheck for writing Chicken Soup for the Soul.

Mark Victor Hansen

The money came after he put his heart and chicken soup soul into the making of a best-seller.

I’ve donated over five thousand hours on my knowledge and I haven’t been paid like a rock-star, a superstar, or a celebrity.  In fact, I haven’t had much ‘luck’ in this industry as I haven’t been paid nearly what would qualify as even close to minimum wage for my over 5,000 hours of learning and accumulation of knowledge that I’ve been tirelessly curating.

I have joined multiple MLM’s and haven’t blamed my upline because I didn’t make it; do you think Susan Sly blames her upline for her foibles or her f-ups?  Hardly.  She’s a multi-millionaire and she’s overcome some incredible obstacles to get there.

Just as Pretty Woman had to overcome the obstacle of being a hooker, a slut, a whore, a prostitute, she rose to the challenge and accepted the position for which she was hired with graciousness knowing full well her week would be over and she would have to go back to working on herself and her life and creating the person she wanted to be, the woman she saw herself as, not as she was seen by others.

You’re not going to make a million overnight.  You’re not even going to make 6 figures in 18 months.  It’s rare and it’s hard work.  And if you’re not willing to put in the time, you’re not going to reap the rewards.  Celebrity status doesn’t happen overnight and if it does, you’re definitely not remembered for longer than a couple weeks.  Just look at Jimmy Davis.

The Free-minatorsFreeloaders

If you’re looking for free you need to drive to Costco and walk the isles ~ they give out free tastes of food all day long.  If you’re looking to build a business then you may or may not be in the right forum.

The free-minators are too much work and they don’t pay off to be on your team.  Let them go and get the people who really want to learn, work and create their business instead of those who blame, whine and expect you to do it for them.

Like the lawyer in Pretty Woman;  the free-minators are everywhere, though sometimes they’re dressed better.

A Journey Worthy of the Lifestyle of  a Pretty Woman

After almost 3 years and over 5,000 hours of learning I often get the question, “Why do you keep going?  Why don’t you just chalk it up to a loss and give up”.

I can’t physically do it.  I can’t give up.  I know I’m close to that shopping spree day when I too can walk down the street, packages in hand, feeling like a Pretty Woman using my cash I’ve accumulated to purchase what I want to make me feel good and pretty just like Julia Roberts did in Pretty Woman ~ a lifestyle I so desperately want to achieve for my sanity and my closet.

Here’s the deal, when you know you will succeed you’ll do whatever it takes.  You’ll sacrifice everything, become homeless (if that’s what it takes) and get so far out of your comfort zone that you wonder if you’re seriously not a candidate for a straight jacket and 500mg of valium on a daily basis.

This isn’t the kind of business where you invest $50.00 a month and all of a sudden you become a millionaire and just like the MTV Videos of yesteryear you’re walking through a wonderland of falling dollars and everything’s coming up hip-hop and sick phat juicy couture.

Caveat Emptor

When you decide you really want to make this your business you’re definitely not going to be calling up people and asking them to do your work for you.  You’ll be sitting down at the computer pen and pad in hand and seriously listening and taking some copious kick ass notes.

I know what I’m talking about when I say to you CAVEAT EMPTOR.  If you can’t deal with giving up, sacrificing and making this your ‘daily bread’ as it were, you’re not going to have the successes of a celebrity network marketing professional.

Click here if you want to START NOW

 

 

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I’m NOT an Addict!! It’s a Prescription!

December 12, 2011 By 10 Comments

“But actually, my drug addiction thing, I was so stubborn.” ~ Sir Elton John

“For the first time in history, a sizable and growing number of U.S. combat troops are taking daily doses of antidepressants to calm nerves strained by….” ~ Military.com

~~Note to the reader:  This is MY PERSONAL Journey, My Opinion, My Caveat, My Perception.  If you don’t like it, use your free Cheeto eating hand to touch that robotic control switch and get to a different damn channel and get off my blog  F-A-S-T!

 

effexor withdrawalWe live in a medicated society,

     but it’s ok, because everyone else is

          medicated too…

                la di da di da

 

I’m a content drug user going to the gym, Peet’s and Whole Foods, sipping my xangiao-lao-fao-something or another yao yao tea latte while taking my clients through a series of  TRX exercises.

I buy organic because I don’t want to be privy to the toxins the growers are putting in the soil in which my food is grown.  Toxicity equates to weakness and toxic pesticides weaken the structure of the fruit and vegetables I’m eating.

I watch what we eat.  I eat what I watch.  I try to leave dairy on the table, and cheat once in a while with that fried saturated Twinkie desert only to wake up every single damn day and on auto-pilot with the nagging thought  ’don’t forget your pill’ as I ingest a highly toxic compound that makes my life worth living.

     Follow me down the rabbit holeeffexor xr withdrawal

I too marched to the pharmaceutical company drum, “We can make it better if you take this pill… your life will be worth living.” I found myself repeating their mantra so scared shitless out of my mind that if I didn’t take my pill my pathetic homeless life as I knew it wasn’t going to be worth living.

As if I had so much to look forward to living in a car with two dogs and no money.  For pathetic souls like myself – the addicts Pfizer created – they would lend a hand and ‘give’ me my pills gratis.  How neighborly.

Kudos to Pfizer for creating another addict.   Well, at least I buy organic.

Negativity pervades the very structure of daily life….

          Thanks to the Pfizer Pimp Daddy Gods for my pills!

pfizer effexor withdrawal

We are consistently bombarded with negativity.  Every other word out of 99% of the population’s mouth is negative.

The news, the pundits, the experts, the celebrities and the like, all serenade us with the plight of the current terrible situation in every corner of the earth as they sport their well coiffed and manicured bodies spewing forth the banal vomit they have licked up from someone else’s wire.  That’s a nice visual.

Or just stand in line at Whole Foods – the organic, free-range, no toxic substance food store – and  listen to the well coiffed banal talking heads around you and you’ll hear them lament about what they had to ‘go through’ today.

It’s a plight, a travesty, a c-o-n spiracy.  All of us are desperate for an answer.

But, that pill I took that morning has helped me find peace of mind knowing that I can walk through my day on auto-pilot. Not to mention, I can feel like I belong because I’m shopping at Whole Foods – where the organic people go.*

*Don’t ask me how I afforded Whole Foods as a homeless person, some things just don’t make sense and that’s one of them. When you’re homeless you find ways to do things that make you feel comfortable and belong in this society.  

pfizer effexorI walk around half-sedated and on auto-pilot only to have nervous breakdowns about some stupid ass comment or some sad state of affairs.  Like that I’m homeless, have no money, have no future and I’m over 40.

I start screaming at myself and hate to look in the mirror because I don’t want to see the person who is such a failure a loser an unattractive ugly fat girl.  I blame my mom and everyone else and then come back to the mirror image of who I am; and as all addicts, I cough up in my semi-lucid state of mania “I hate myself.”

It’s no wonder people want to medicate – it’s enough to get out of bed and not be bombarded by the negative ‘vibes’, the caustic comments, the nasty rants, the less than happy campers surrounding us…It’s far worse when you hate yourself.

These are my thoughts as I gingerly walk down the street with my two dogs…

I think about the e-mail I received from some woman who unsubscribed from my e-mail blasts noting that she is being told by me to invest in herself and that she needs to watch her money.  Hence her unsubscription.

Her e-mail has since been deleted because her stupidity is her downfall and her lack of understanding that SHE IS HER BUSINESS obviously never pervaded her thought process.

I am not here to give her a F.R.E.E. education because she subscribed to a fucking e-mail list.  Get off my e-mail list lady, I don’t want your ENTITLEMENT attitude to pervade my system.  Seriously.  It’s your business you don’t want to invest in yourself, that’s your damn problem.

You blood sucking, lazy-ass, cheeto-eating, free-loading tick of a human being with your hand out waiting for someone else to pick up your mess.

   

 ”Effexor XR isn’t an addictive drug; you can go off it whenever you want.” ~ my doctor in 2007

Withdrawal from being an addict even though according to Pfizer

                   I’m officially not an “addict”…

effexor withdrawalI watch my step as I descend from said curb to the street – it’s a big step for me because my equilibrium has decided to take hiatus and Vertigo has now set in as my balance. My roller coaster ride hasn’t ended since this began last Wednesday the 7th of December.

My last ‘official’ Effexor XR pill was Tuesday December 6th @ approximately 8:30am.  It’s been almost a week without my pill.  It’s been almost a week of severe side effects and WITHDRAWAL like that of an addict.

But, I’m not an addict.

According to the drug maker, Pfizer, Effexor XR is not addictive.  Really Pfizer, have you tried to get off this shit?

  • Have you woken up to frightening brain zaps where your head literally feels like it’s been electrocuted only to vomit uncontrollably on yourself?
  • When you feel so ashamed because you can’t sleep one night without vommitting on your sheets, your bed, yourself.
  • I feel like Linda Blair looks, head spinning, vomit spewing forth, room spinning, voices and low groans coming from the depth of my diaphragm only to be ‘jolted’ again by a severe brain zap that has everything to do with the withdrawal of a drug that I’m NOT ADDICTED TO.  Are you fucking kidding me?
  • The nausea, dizziness, dry mouth, fits of uncontrollable crying, gasping for air because I can’t get it together enough to walk into a grocery store without wanting to cry.
  • How about the consistent feeling of abandonement, the scared and frightened feeling of waking up alone, lonely, unable to comprehend why anyone would want to talk to me let alone ask you a question like, “Hey how are you doing?”
  • Or that everyone is suspect.  The paranoia at its’ all time high having to deal with the feelings of being ‘good enough’ or feeling attractive or wanted.  Why the hell would you want to know how I’m doing anyway?

If you’re over 40 years old, single, never been married, have no family, and are friendless within the scope of having anyone around you that wants to deal with you, you’ll understand what I’m talking about.

If you aren’t then this doesn’t apply to you and you’re probably on the wrong page – go watch Fox News and Rush Limbaugh you’re not ready for this reality show.

     brain zapsBrain Zaps; the withdrawal symptoms of Effexor XR

Today I’m on the phone with my partner in crime and BFF.  She’s also my invest in your business partner, my part-time shrink, and my sounding board on everything and anything related to network marketing and our lives as we’ve blithely danced the network marketing mambo to come to the arena we are now.

We exchange stories about our “why” we were attracted to network marketing in the first place and come to some parallel realizations.

Having been through a very similar situation as myself, she describes her wanting to connect.  Being alone and lonely is a battle no one wants to fight; the loss is beyond sustainable and when you make it out – if you make it out of that battle, you’re scathed, exhausted and beaten down.

We both agree that within network marketing we have somewhat filled a gap we each had individually to ‘connect’ to other like minded people who resonated with us to create and achieve a better life.

We wanted to be away from the 99.99% of the people out there who just don’t believe in themselves or anything other than Rush Limbaugh, Dick Cheney and Dr. Phil-I-Know-All.  Don’t get me started on the political scene, I’m still a recovering addict.

I give her some information on the brain zaps I’m experiencing constantly and how I’m surprised and even a bit proud of myself for my continued lucidity.  I am capable of maintaining a conversation without regurgitating some nonsensical rant all over her and tethering her to my rabbit hole of consciousness or lack thereof.

Note to self:  Don’t throw up on BFFeffexor

Brain zaps a.k.a., withdrawal symptoms from Effexor, are  like being tortured with whiplash and dizzy spells after you’ve had way too much to drink and are near alcohol poisoning.  I constantly feel like I’m recovering from a really terrible hangover which leads me to believe I will not be drinking anytime soon.

These brain zaps are beyond anything I’ve ever experienced and I get them constantly, they pervade thoughts, infiltrate your nervous system, and debilitate your being.

You can’t concentrate and if you try, you’ll be spending a good portion of your waking moments wondering what the hell you’re concentrating on.  But Pfizer says I’m not addicted.  Yeah right!

For a personal trainer and triathlete this is a big blow to my ego and to my physical and sensory perception.  I literally have to watch where I’m going to because I will trip and fall.  So, instead of looking down and then back up, I carry a flashlight with me if I have to go outside at night because it helps me to focus on where I’m going without looking down to see if I’m going to step on something and fall.  I find the flashlight an apropos analogy to every day life – albeit, I’d like to be able to walk without one.

No, I’m not an addict, but I sure as hell feel like one.

What Is Effexor?velafaxina

Effexor XR is an anti-depressant anti-anxiety drug.  It creates more seratonin in your system.  Basically, it makes you happy when you’re not,  and it is supposed to help you ‘deal’ with life.  It’s a fake drug based on a fake society of automatons.

This is going to sound paranoid, but here’s why I believe Effexor is on the market and widely distributed to us when we can’t deal with our lives.

It is good for those who want to take control over your mind and make you believe that what you’re feeling is not what you’re really feeling and you’ glide through your days on auto-pilot in quiet desperation not getting upset, not getting pissed off, basically not feeling your life.  I can tell you first hand, this is exactly what this drug does to people because I’m one of them.

It reminds me of The Stepford Wives.  A medicated society based on a government who’s biggest lobbyists are the drug companies who want to be able to ‘control’ the mindset of said society so that when they shove some big ass freak like Rush Limbaugh down their throat the society won’t throw up all over them and will inevitably bless said government for being so kind as to bring such a pariah to us who will help us see the light with their narcissistic , white supremacy views thereby voting for the next deliberate war we have against any country who won’t give us their natural reserves such as oil and gold.

   and why did I start taking it…..

Vegas, the bane of our society as a whole

addictionLong story short is that I started on this drug in 2007.  Working in the casino as a cocktail waitress I would leave work and get anxiety attacks about having to go back to work.  Knowing I couldn’t live without money I had to force myself to go to work.  I hated being in the smoke, the sickness, the disease, the ill-will, the constant entitlement attitude, the fat, the lazy, the seekers, the losers, and the disgusting arena that the casino is and always will represent to me.

I used to leave work and see the same person 12 hours later when I’d come back to work sitting in the same chair giving their ATM card to the manager of the casino to get them cash so they didn’t have to leave the machine because they were ‘on a roll’ and could ‘feel it’ it’s going to happen soon.

As they would defecate on themselves and be put in handcuffs and taken out of the casino they would scream and cry throwing fits, kicking the security guards as shit flew all around them, the stench far worse than a sewer.

I would watch people lose money they didn’t have.  I saw men haul off and beat the living shit out of the women they were fighting with and vice/versa.  There were women who would pick up bar stools and beat down the man they were with if they didn’t give them money to gamble.  9 times out of 10 those were hookers.  I served men who would throw their drinks at me if they were losing or they’d belittle me that I didn’t put enough alcohol in their drink and call me a stingy bitch.

Well, at least they got half of that right!

Most nights I felt humiliated and no better than a hooker walking around with a tray calling out ‘cocktails? cocktails?’

I would say I had clothes on, but I couldn’t actually call that costume ‘clothing’ it was more like a spandex loin cloth.

Many times there would be fights where people would literally beat each other so badly they would end up in the intensive care units of the hospital.  I’ve seen beer bottles smashed over heads and then the same bottle taken to the face of an unsuspecting dealer cutting their nose off their face.

I’ve seen people pissing on the feet of the dealers because they didn’t want to go to the bathroom and leave the table.

I’ve seen hookers get beaten by pimps, pimps get arrested by police.

And the lonely men looking for a one night stand who have had everything stolen from them because they believed some girl they met in the elevator really ‘liked’ them and they gave them the key to their room only to come back to an empty room with absolutely nothing left.

It was only a matter of time before I either became one of these people or was put in an insane asylum because I had to deal with them.  Effexor was the answer.

Addiction 101 Vegas Stylevegas

I would venture to say that everyone who works in Vegas is addicted to a prescription drug – now, that seems a bit harsh, but in reality it’s true.

I was involved with a gambling addict who was quite well versed in prescription drugs and gambling for that matter.

People move to Vegas for five reasons:  Money, Gambling, Drugs, Sex and Porn.  Whether you believe it or not, I don’t care.  I’m not here to argue with your morals or your personal interests.

Let’s just put it this way, you can go to any doctor with a grocery list of drugs you need and walk out with a script for anything and everything and a few more that you’ll need to counterbalance the others you’re taking within 15 minutes.

Even the doctors are addicted to drugs. Whether it’s growth hormone, plastic surgery, oxycontin, tramadol, pain killers, pain enhancers, anti-depressants like effexor or prozac, or euphoric pills.  Whatever your happy hour drug of choice isyou’ll get them in Vegas.

I have never worked in such a degrading, depressing, corrupt, nasty, rude, mean, and the list goes on -town such as Vegas. Which is probably why I really hate it when the network marketing conferences are held in that town; it’s an in and out deal for me – the sooner I can leave the better I am.

What is my take on anti-depressants?evil effexor

A lot different than my take on them 14 days ago.

Look, I was decidedly ‘hooked’ on Effexor.  In fact, I would tell everyone about my amazing friend, Effexor and how it enabled me to deal with my life.  Effexor was my credo, my dogma, my true hypothesis.  I was ‘hooked’ that Pfizer had made a winning drug and that this was the way of the world.  Everyone should be on this drug.  That was 14 days ago.

I had suffered through a  2 day withdrawal 4 years ago and since then wholeheartedly believed that I could never go off this drug because it was not feasible for me to keep my sanity and deal with my life without it.

Talk about dependence.  When you convince yourself that the drug you are using is not only the answer to all of your prayers but it will inevitably make your life better because you take it is a sad state of affairs.  That’s like finding the answer to your life through someone else.  In fact, it’s EXACTLY like that.  I found the answer to my sorrow, my fear, my loneliness, my life through this drug.

I don’t care if you take anti-depressants.  I don’t care what you take.  This isn’t about you.  This is about my journey in the last 6 days through what has been a living hell of nauseousness, sickness, vomiting, dizziness, brain zaps and that’s not all. It’s my journey through a rabbit hole of addiction based on a drug that is non-addictive.  It is my journey.  Not yours.

I’m one of millions of Effexor patients who are or were on this drug in its’ varying forms and degrees of potency.  I’m one of many people who have been told the drug isn’t addictive only to be lied to and find that my body cannot function normally without it.

My only advice to myself is each moment I must be aware of what I’m doing and where I am.  I must learn to cope without creating a drama fit for an off-Broadway production in New York City.

Strength?  I don’t care to hear “be strong Nic” that’s such a cliche and to me it’s something someone will say to me when they don’t know what else to say because they think they have to say something.

You don’t have to say anything to a drug addict.  There’s nothing to say.  You just listen, learn and move on with your life. Just like I have learned to do.

Filed Under: Health & Wealth, My Story Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

SEO is NOT PPC

December 2, 2011 By 2 Comments

SEO is Dead He Said

seo is not ppc“SEO is dead, nobody uses that anymore.” he said to me as I explained to him what I was learning.  “Yeah, you’ll make more selling my business than you will at SEO.”  At which point I asked him, “What are you doing to get your product ranked organically on the first page of Google? I mean, is your site even ranked?”

 

He looked at me quizzically, mouth open and tongue wagging, and all of a sudden an amount of regurgitation beyond anything I could imagine came spewing forth; this was some crazy hooga booga inexplicable psycho-babble that made sense only to a used car salesman.

 

As usual, someone who wants to defend their business and their marketing efforts, or lack of knowledge thereof, will throw up all over you with some crazy definition that doesn’t make sense.  They’ll talk fast and they’ll make it sound great.  These are the people who gave us network marketing professionals a bad rep in the first place!

So What Is SEO Anyway?

It stands for Search Engine Optimization and is used to ‘rank’ in the search engines such as Bing, Google, Alta, Ask, etc.  If you aren’t familiar with SEO you’ll soon become very familiar because in this industry a great deal of your on page marketing begins and relies on SEO.

 

SEO is a way to organically rank in the search engines for the niche market and product keywords you are using.  That’s a very general definition.  Basically if you’re looking to rank on the 1st page of Google for Flowers and you don’t want to pay for advertising, you’re going to use SEO.

 

So, let’s break this down a bit because there is alot more to ‘ranking’ than that general definition I just gave, but I don’t want to write a novel here, I just want to give a general overview about why SEO is not PPC and in order to give a good overview I must define a bit more.

This is the Golden Triangle, a.k.a., a heat map

 

seo is not ppc

that shows where people are clicking on to the page of a search in Google.  The red area shows that the searchers are clicking on the organic area of the search not the paid for advertising on the right as shown here:

seo is not ppc

The goal with PPC is to pay for placement; whereas the goal with SEO is to rank on the page organically by using ‘votes’ or clicks to get you to that area; one way to get you to the top of the page.  The golden triangle shows where people’s eyeballs are looking right away.  It shows how easy it is to get ranked for your keywords IF you apply and implement the strategies of SEO.

So How Does Google Rank Your Page?

Google reads the code of a page like this:

So if your site is written in Flash and it looks really cool, while lots of people are saying, wow man your site rocks!  Google can’t see it because there is no code.seo is not ppcSo while you may have a URL, the search engines don’t see your site because they can’t read movies and Flash is a movie to the search engine.

The code? What does it stand for?  I mean, like what the heck is all that gibberish?  It’s called ‘meta’ tags and it’s written in html (hyper text markup language) and it tells the search engine spiders what to look for and where.

Ranking and Backlinks: Show The Love

Another way Google ranks your page is by ‘votes’ or links to your site via other sites that have a high page rank index.  So, if I’m a small flower shop locally and I have a link from 1-800-flowers, a page that has a high page rank index, I will be ‘lifted up’ through the ranks of flower peddlers and put on a pedestal because I have a link from 1-800-Flowers linking directly to my page.  Here’s the trick:  I didn’t link to 1-800-flowers, they linked to me! This means I have ‘clout’ among those in the industry or within that particular niche market: flowers.

**For those of you wondering what a “link” is it’s the text you’ll click on in a website that will take you out of that website to a different page, a different site, a buy button, or out in space to cyberworld.  It’s when you click on a ‘hyperlink’ that will take you to the next cyberland frontier.

So, what happens if I don’t have a hookup at 1-800-flowers and I can’t get them to link to my page?  Well, then I’ll find other pages that have a lesser rank in page index, but are within that same niche market I’m going after and get them to link to my page. These are also great ways to get ‘ranked’ in the search engines.  But, I’m not going to go into this in depth because the point is that SEO is not PPC and I’ve yet to get to that part.

As a conclusion to backlinks, they are not tricky, they’re time consuming unless you know how to do them correctly.  There’s a method to the madness and if you haven’t taken a course on SEO you may want to look into it if you think it’s something you want to learn.  Here’s an article (a backlink) to one of my colleagues who has some interesting ideas about SEO as well.

Now, for the reason of this article in the first place….

SEO IS NOT PPCseo is not ppc

Search engine optimization relies on organic  ranking, not paid for ranking.  PPC is pay per click whereby you take out an ad on a search engine to show your product – you’re paying for the privilege of being on the 1st page because you’re paying a fortune for that particular key word.  Or maybe not.

Either way, SEO does not use PPC and vice/versa.  With PPC you are ‘bidding’ on keywords.  In SEO you are ‘ranking’ for keywords.  Very different.  With SEO you have a choice as to what you want to rank for and how you want to do it; with PPC you pay for the keyword and that’s that.

So, contrary to what Mr. Know It All Psycho Babble had to effuse about SEO; it is definitely not dead and it’s definitely in its’ infancy.  There’s a lot to know about the internet and it changes roughly every 90 days.  What was used 2 years ago is no longer around and the same will be said two years from now.  I can tell you that SEO is definitely the way companies are going to target their niche markets and their niche buyers.

So, if you’re looking to rank in Google, AltaVista, Bing, Ask, et al, you may want to consider learning SEO, it’s not that hard, and it’s definitely an interesting subject.  Look, if I can learn it, so can you!

Filed Under: Keywords & SEO Tagged With: , , ,
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